remembering when.

ironically called "remembering when";
thats exactly what i was doing all night,
at the art ball.
this time,
i went solo.
well, third-wheeled.
which, might have been worse?

i remembered when we danced out on the patio,
in the chilly air.

they danced; i watched.

i remembered when we held hands, and surrounded by art, you couldnt take your eyes off of me.

they held hands; i watched.

i remembered when we had conversations all evening; during dinner, and during the ball.

they talked; i listened.

i remember walking through the sculpture garden, and sitting in the photo room talking about glory paintings.

they and me, we took a photo. them two, and me.

now i sit, remembering the earrings you got me in india; i wore them tonight.
while i sat alone; and looked at someone else's old photographs.
i wonder why, its so hard for me to be this one person,
when it used to be all i knew.
i wonder why, everyone is coupled up, and i appear to be the only one alone.
i feel like i'm intruding.
i wonder how, anything could really be wrong;
i'm alive; above ground and vertical.
but there's more;

goodness, i miss you. it grows more and more each day.

<3 i do love you.